Being a footballer’s girlfriend or wife takes practice, believe me. I just looked like a lemon.
I have never really fitted in anywhere, nowhere at all. I have always been quite aware of feeling slightly out of place in a variety of situations. It started at tap dancing class, where my ability was so distressing that I felt the only way to conceal the substandard shuffle ball change was to make as much noise as possible with my tap shoes to distract from the unsatisfactory goings-on in row three.